Ok, so I’m not really going to tell you how to dress a monkey. I’m talking about kids. I often say trying to dress my kids is like trying to dress a monkey. It was hilarious watching my husband trying to do it yesterday. So here’s my take on it.
1. Gather clothes and find somewhere with lots of space (you’re going to need it for all the flailing and flopping around)
2. Wrestle child into your lap
3. Attempt to put shirt over child’s head while they scream because their face is covered
4. Struggle to get both arms in the shirt for the next 5 minutes (they will remove one arm while you are getting the other in and vice versa several times)
5. Wrestle child back in your lap after they start running circles around you
6. Attempt to put pants on your child while they continuously put both feet into the same hole and/or keep pulling their legs out of the holes
7. Finally get pants on child and pull them up right before they start running circles around you again
8. Look at the socks and shoes you got out and decide against even attempting that
9. Bang your head against the wall after 15 minutes of wrestling your child into clothes
10. Decide to never dress your kid again until a.)they are old enough to do it themselves or b.)until you have someone to hold them down during the process
Now pour yourself a glass of wine and enjoy because you darn well deserve it after that ordeal! Hope this helps.
If you enjoyed this post, please share. And check out my post 10 Essentials for Surviving a Toddler and a Baby for more parenting humor.